Arkus went off to learn more of the ways of his clan now that he was secure in the knowledge that I was alright, and Hallie also went off to work with Cana and continue her studies. I was pleased to learn that she was doing well with that one temperamental beast, she was doing well and I was very happy to hear this. The youngest son was nearby helping Nasatai and learning various herbs, for we used not only the good ones but also the ones that were deadly and toxic. They had their uses. This left me with peace and quiet, and I allowed myself to ponder a few things that would drift thru my mind as if on the crest of the gentle ebbing and flowing of the thassa. There was an awareness of many things and thoughts that lingered , they do not disappear simply because I am awake and without fever. I still feel the pain that it took to breathe because of the rush of fire thru my lungs, the heaviness of it as if the bosk were standing atop of me. The sensations to numerous to mention but yet not forgotten, nor do I forget what I have seen and heard. The images are in my mind so vividly that I could reach out and touch them. There was a reason for this but not the one that the culprit intended that bestowed this upon me.
No things did not go as they planned and this I found to be very amusing to me in a rather twisted dark way.
There are a few things that I have found strange to my mind as Ulric and a few others caught me up on various things, but then I had heard of them prior to this, I could only shake my head at a few things, and nod at things that I really was not surprised about. The only thing I could say was interesting, and well that was a clue that I was not about to voice my opinion on things at the moment. There are a few items on a more personal note that interest me but I will not voice them in fact I will not write them, I will just have to wait to see the whys of it and what will come of it. These are personal thoughts that I do not share, why add static to the winds of chaos that seem to linger in the air, I did ask Ulric a few pointed questions that had him uncomfortable but he did share his thoughts with that brutal honesty that I had come to expect and count on. There is something within the air, there will death in the air. I have seen it and felt it. But it has not been shown whose or how many.
But I have seen the face of the one who will cause it. I was hoping I had been wrong, but unfortunately that is not the case. Eventually I pushed myself up and left the wagon, I do not dwell on things and allow myself to fall into a well of despair that is not my way . I am a Tuchuk woman, I am strong. I do not fall prey to certain weaknesses, although there are the ones no one knows of that I do fall into at times. But I never linger for longer than a few ihn, after all what Tuchuk woman would allow herself to become a dithering dolt over life. I know that I do not. And even if I did, not one damn person would know of it. I don't wear my emotions or thoughts on my sleeve like some badge of courage or martyrdom. Life is to short, and is meant to be lived and experienced. We never know when someone we love or care about rides off if they will return, that is why we embrace life daily and celebrate it daily, there is no time to dwell on the negative or the what if's. All the good and bad have something to offer. But it takes strength, courage and honor to live and walk thru veils,shadows and storms that often cloak the greater true meaning of what we experience. Life tends to reveal the strong and the weak. Life tends to reveal the truth and deceptions of people. The question is not what you will do about others, it is what you will do about yourself.
There are a few things that I have found strange to my mind as Ulric and a few others caught me up on various things, but then I had heard of them prior to this, I could only shake my head at a few things, and nod at things that I really was not surprised about. The only thing I could say was interesting, and well that was a clue that I was not about to voice my opinion on things at the moment. There are a few items on a more personal note that interest me but I will not voice them in fact I will not write them, I will just have to wait to see the whys of it and what will come of it. These are personal thoughts that I do not share, why add static to the winds of chaos that seem to linger in the air, I did ask Ulric a few pointed questions that had him uncomfortable but he did share his thoughts with that brutal honesty that I had come to expect and count on. There is something within the air, there will death in the air. I have seen it and felt it. But it has not been shown whose or how many.
But I have seen the face of the one who will cause it. I was hoping I had been wrong, but unfortunately that is not the case. Eventually I pushed myself up and left the wagon, I do not dwell on things and allow myself to fall into a well of despair that is not my way . I am a Tuchuk woman, I am strong. I do not fall prey to certain weaknesses, although there are the ones no one knows of that I do fall into at times. But I never linger for longer than a few ihn, after all what Tuchuk woman would allow herself to become a dithering dolt over life. I know that I do not. And even if I did, not one damn person would know of it. I don't wear my emotions or thoughts on my sleeve like some badge of courage or martyrdom. Life is to short, and is meant to be lived and experienced. We never know when someone we love or care about rides off if they will return, that is why we embrace life daily and celebrate it daily, there is no time to dwell on the negative or the what if's. All the good and bad have something to offer. But it takes strength, courage and honor to live and walk thru veils,shadows and storms that often cloak the greater true meaning of what we experience. Life tends to reveal the strong and the weak. Life tends to reveal the truth and deceptions of people. The question is not what you will do about others, it is what you will do about yourself.
No one is exempt from the humor or fury of the skies, and everyone eventually feels the grace and blessing of the skies, sometimes you lose things you did not know you were to have because of something you did. And other times you recieve things that you fail to see are a gift at first, and some never do until they lose it. The skies take care of everything even to those that think they have done nothing and yet are the very ones who have walked a path of lies and manipulations and live for only themselves in the guise of wanting to help others. And seek to hurt others in order to get what or who they want. They suffer because of it but are to blind to see. But that is the lesson of the skies.
They will not tell you this is your lesson. It is up to each person to figure it out. And if you do not you are doomed to repeat it worse than the first time you missed it. This is why I do not interfere in things I know I am not able to and other times I know when I am able to offer guidance. Age makes no difference in these things, sometimes the older ones get a harsher lesson because they should know better but get settled and forget a few things. I sure know few of mine have pulverized my brain until it is a bloody pulp and I finally have to say, "okay, I get it.. I get it.. " I do not learn things easy and never have, I know this of myself. I suppose that is why father tells people I gave him gray hair at a young age.
Mist Runner was there waiting for me, to take me on a slow easy ride over the plains, I am no fool, I will not push myself to far so soon, but I also will not sit and do nothing, idleness is not my way. As we rode I would close my eyes and let allow myself to move with his rhythm, allowing myself to once more become one with the plains in a way that I could never begin to make understood. There is that mystical part of the clan that is hidden and yet we live them daily we practice them until they are as natural to us as breathing,
It was some time later that I would return and walked to the healers wagon and allowed one of the older ones of the healer clan that I knew as a child to examine me. We spoke of many things and I gifted her with supply of special healing salve that I made a few hands ago. It was made of rare herbs and plants along with a dash of something unique that I would not divulge.But its properties were very strong, I could tell by her smile she was appreciative of it and she knew what it was for, to me that is all that mattered was the smile in that old weathered face of Niasa.
I would rest there for a few ahns at her request.. And I knew by her smile that she knew I was not about to remain there to long.
They will not tell you this is your lesson. It is up to each person to figure it out. And if you do not you are doomed to repeat it worse than the first time you missed it. This is why I do not interfere in things I know I am not able to and other times I know when I am able to offer guidance. Age makes no difference in these things, sometimes the older ones get a harsher lesson because they should know better but get settled and forget a few things. I sure know few of mine have pulverized my brain until it is a bloody pulp and I finally have to say, "okay, I get it.. I get it.. " I do not learn things easy and never have, I know this of myself. I suppose that is why father tells people I gave him gray hair at a young age.
Mist Runner was there waiting for me, to take me on a slow easy ride over the plains, I am no fool, I will not push myself to far so soon, but I also will not sit and do nothing, idleness is not my way. As we rode I would close my eyes and let allow myself to move with his rhythm, allowing myself to once more become one with the plains in a way that I could never begin to make understood. There is that mystical part of the clan that is hidden and yet we live them daily we practice them until they are as natural to us as breathing,
It was some time later that I would return and walked to the healers wagon and allowed one of the older ones of the healer clan that I knew as a child to examine me. We spoke of many things and I gifted her with supply of special healing salve that I made a few hands ago. It was made of rare herbs and plants along with a dash of something unique that I would not divulge.But its properties were very strong, I could tell by her smile she was appreciative of it and she knew what it was for, to me that is all that mattered was the smile in that old weathered face of Niasa.
I would rest there for a few ahns at her request.. And I knew by her smile that she knew I was not about to remain there to long.
