It was later in the evening before I made my way from the healers wagon towards the main fire of the harriga, I was tired and it felt as if each step was a chore to take.But I am the determined type and I wasn't about to let my movements be like quicksand, all thick and slow. With some effort I neared the main fires, I am guessing I must have really looked as bad as I felt or worse, I am sure the ravishes of the illness had taken their toll. I was very surprised when Ayguili walked to me and offered his arm to walk me to the fire. Yes, I knew then I really had to look like death warmed over and rather frail, not a very good way to want to appear before others. I was thankful for the support in truth it helped and I did say thank you, but it still did not mean I had to like that I appeared like some old frail woman. I would have to make sure I did something on that.
I had to chuckle a bit as he asked if I was supposed to be out of the healers wagon, well, now how to answer that, the way I figure it, I had heard of no orders, and no one stopped me so I could pretty much do as I felt up to. Besides I am not over doing it. And it seemed no one was going to let me, I can see this is going to be a challenge and an irritant.
I saw Trilok and Noya and their two newborn babies, a boy and a girl. It is good to see them healthy and doing well, and good to watch the proud parents. And the demands of new babies are made known so they did not linger long, I remained seated and accepted the offer of blackwine, and of course he made sure to let me know not to get used to it and then added he was getting his own anyway. I had to chuckle and assure him not to worry that I would not get used to such. We talked for a few ehn and I will be damned do you know that man actually smiled and laughed. Twice in one night.
He asked if I really was alright I assured him I was on my way, he commented on how far away I had gone, in truth I was far enough away that I really was not sure I could make it back. We talked of various things I knew that I had heard a few things he spoke of, and he told me that he was glad I was back that I had much work to do. Well I am not sure of that part but it was an interesting discussion that we had along with him teasing me of something I said and did or was that what I did not say or do. We spoke of why the sleen could not track anything in the place the arrows had been found, I gave my thoughts on this and I could see he was thinking upon it, I have had a few thoughts on this as well as an idea or two, this is something to speak with Ba'atar on. So when he returns what we have learned will be shared with him.
It was about then Ba'tars slave joined us, no big deal to me she is but another slave about the camp so she is easily tolerated. Ayguili asked my thoughts on someone, I told him I would speak to him about it the next I saw him, truth is some things I will not speak of at the main fires and some things I will not speak of in front of a slave, men may find them irresistible and trust them, but I wouldn't trust her as far as I could throw her and given she is bigger than me, that is not to far. Personally I still think her eyes would look good in my jar.
It takes a unique type of slave for me to even allow them near me, I do not trust them, my reasons pretty valid as it is not about jealousy,or envy or want. Actually it isn't even on that level, because I know far more about them than they would ever begin to understand. It is more on a survival level I have not forgotten what two tried to do and that one cost me my daughter. So yes, it goes without saying that I do not trust them very much. I find it amusing they would think every free woman jealous of them. I don't think so, because I know if I have a mans heart, no one will be able to touch it. I know of some women that are, fact is I am secure in myself as a woman and as a person. So jealous.. no.. cautious of them.. very much so. I do know how they manipulate to try and have themselves as the center of the universe to men and will do everything they can to make it so. I have watched some good women and men be destroyed. So for one to be even remotely close to me.
Is because it has been earned.
I had to chuckle a bit as he asked if I was supposed to be out of the healers wagon, well, now how to answer that, the way I figure it, I had heard of no orders, and no one stopped me so I could pretty much do as I felt up to. Besides I am not over doing it. And it seemed no one was going to let me, I can see this is going to be a challenge and an irritant.
I saw Trilok and Noya and their two newborn babies, a boy and a girl. It is good to see them healthy and doing well, and good to watch the proud parents. And the demands of new babies are made known so they did not linger long, I remained seated and accepted the offer of blackwine, and of course he made sure to let me know not to get used to it and then added he was getting his own anyway. I had to chuckle and assure him not to worry that I would not get used to such. We talked for a few ehn and I will be damned do you know that man actually smiled and laughed. Twice in one night.
He asked if I really was alright I assured him I was on my way, he commented on how far away I had gone, in truth I was far enough away that I really was not sure I could make it back. We talked of various things I knew that I had heard a few things he spoke of, and he told me that he was glad I was back that I had much work to do. Well I am not sure of that part but it was an interesting discussion that we had along with him teasing me of something I said and did or was that what I did not say or do. We spoke of why the sleen could not track anything in the place the arrows had been found, I gave my thoughts on this and I could see he was thinking upon it, I have had a few thoughts on this as well as an idea or two, this is something to speak with Ba'atar on. So when he returns what we have learned will be shared with him.
It was about then Ba'tars slave joined us, no big deal to me she is but another slave about the camp so she is easily tolerated. Ayguili asked my thoughts on someone, I told him I would speak to him about it the next I saw him, truth is some things I will not speak of at the main fires and some things I will not speak of in front of a slave, men may find them irresistible and trust them, but I wouldn't trust her as far as I could throw her and given she is bigger than me, that is not to far. Personally I still think her eyes would look good in my jar.
It takes a unique type of slave for me to even allow them near me, I do not trust them, my reasons pretty valid as it is not about jealousy,or envy or want. Actually it isn't even on that level, because I know far more about them than they would ever begin to understand. It is more on a survival level I have not forgotten what two tried to do and that one cost me my daughter. So yes, it goes without saying that I do not trust them very much. I find it amusing they would think every free woman jealous of them. I don't think so, because I know if I have a mans heart, no one will be able to touch it. I know of some women that are, fact is I am secure in myself as a woman and as a person. So jealous.. no.. cautious of them.. very much so. I do know how they manipulate to try and have themselves as the center of the universe to men and will do everything they can to make it so. I have watched some good women and men be destroyed. So for one to be even remotely close to me.
Is because it has been earned.
