Today was the first day in some time I have actually sat for an extended period of time, not because I had a choice in the matter, Bolormaa put her foot down and gave me that look that clearly meant she was not asking she was telling me I was going to rest. Now, what can you say to a woman who is older than the dirt itself upon the plains. There was absolutely no way I was telling her no, she is one of those women that you just give a respectful "Yes, Ma'am" and do as she says.
Not because I fear her because I do not though it funny to see many younger ones fear her and even some of the older members of the tribe give her a wide berth when she comes near. She makes many uneasy and well they quickly find other places they have to be. It is because she has earned that much respect that I would not insult or dishonor her. She was right. I needed to rest. She was also right that Garyx would not be happy about it either. She did assure me he was alright, I knew this but yet there is that part of me that is the woman and mate that interfered in with what I knew and caused the seeds of worry to germinate within my mind and heart. I found myself awake late into the night walking thru the quiet of the camp and along the vast expanse of the plains. I also found myself working nonstop like I used to do before. I know why I was, it was to keep my hands and mind busy. If I was busy I would worry less, and if I was to exhausted to think or move then I could sleep. She yelled at me for not eating, I have this tendency to forget when I am immersed in work and the care of the wagons, the creation of spells, talismans and so many other things that can keep my busy every ahn of the day for many envars.
So I find myself on enforced rest, well, what do I do with myself, the children are all busy with their own lives, the youngest one needs my care yet and even he amuses himself for a few ahns and plays with other children before he finds his furs. I have sat on the platform of my wagon doing some needlework and watching people, I noticed that I did not see Cana, I know she is busy with a new baby and the other boys and her mate along with her clan, I am glad to see her begin to return to herself, to be herself and do clan work, Hallie I know has been at the pens and wherever there are injured animals to practice on. Arkus he has been hunting with Chay, father I know has been busy in the camp taking care of major and minor things. Silk and Shi I have not seen for some time either, but I know they are rediscovering their lives and each other. Nette and Ramza I have not seen them, I hope all is well with them also. Each of us have been so busy that I think we all have lost sight of each other, how and when did this happen. Is it a cycle to go thru or is it just life. It is never easy to tell if it is one or the other or both. Noya I know is often busy with her clan as well, I have heard whispers that Trilok can now mate her, I am happy to hear this, she deserves to find love again. And he is a fine warrior to provide for her. I have not seen Ba 'atar but I hear the various songs of the clan so I know he is busy there also and with his newest addition.
I find myself gazing over the plains, I cant help but worry. My sister Dina I am concerned about her also and Lukus, I have not felt them for a while or heard anything, Something must be in the air that seems to be creating a bubble around everyone preventing the natural ebb and flow of energy. I find myself fighting the urge to go out and look for Garyx, regardless of the consequence, I am very tempted. Sometimes I am not always a good Tuchuk woman that sits behind waiting. Sometimes I just do what I feel I need to. I find that feeling beginning to pull at me.
The question is. How long will I sit here and how long before I decide to do something?
Not because I fear her because I do not though it funny to see many younger ones fear her and even some of the older members of the tribe give her a wide berth when she comes near. She makes many uneasy and well they quickly find other places they have to be. It is because she has earned that much respect that I would not insult or dishonor her. She was right. I needed to rest. She was also right that Garyx would not be happy about it either. She did assure me he was alright, I knew this but yet there is that part of me that is the woman and mate that interfered in with what I knew and caused the seeds of worry to germinate within my mind and heart. I found myself awake late into the night walking thru the quiet of the camp and along the vast expanse of the plains. I also found myself working nonstop like I used to do before. I know why I was, it was to keep my hands and mind busy. If I was busy I would worry less, and if I was to exhausted to think or move then I could sleep. She yelled at me for not eating, I have this tendency to forget when I am immersed in work and the care of the wagons, the creation of spells, talismans and so many other things that can keep my busy every ahn of the day for many envars.
So I find myself on enforced rest, well, what do I do with myself, the children are all busy with their own lives, the youngest one needs my care yet and even he amuses himself for a few ahns and plays with other children before he finds his furs. I have sat on the platform of my wagon doing some needlework and watching people, I noticed that I did not see Cana, I know she is busy with a new baby and the other boys and her mate along with her clan, I am glad to see her begin to return to herself, to be herself and do clan work, Hallie I know has been at the pens and wherever there are injured animals to practice on. Arkus he has been hunting with Chay, father I know has been busy in the camp taking care of major and minor things. Silk and Shi I have not seen for some time either, but I know they are rediscovering their lives and each other. Nette and Ramza I have not seen them, I hope all is well with them also. Each of us have been so busy that I think we all have lost sight of each other, how and when did this happen. Is it a cycle to go thru or is it just life. It is never easy to tell if it is one or the other or both. Noya I know is often busy with her clan as well, I have heard whispers that Trilok can now mate her, I am happy to hear this, she deserves to find love again. And he is a fine warrior to provide for her. I have not seen Ba 'atar but I hear the various songs of the clan so I know he is busy there also and with his newest addition.
I find myself gazing over the plains, I cant help but worry. My sister Dina I am concerned about her also and Lukus, I have not felt them for a while or heard anything, Something must be in the air that seems to be creating a bubble around everyone preventing the natural ebb and flow of energy. I find myself fighting the urge to go out and look for Garyx, regardless of the consequence, I am very tempted. Sometimes I am not always a good Tuchuk woman that sits behind waiting. Sometimes I just do what I feel I need to. I find that feeling beginning to pull at me.
The question is. How long will I sit here and how long before I decide to do something?
